Posted on Tuesday, 8th September 2009 by Catherine

This week’s Mental Music Monday (although on a Tuesday) is dedicated to my kids.  It is so true that our wish for our kids is for “life to become all that they want it to, their dreams to stay big, worries stay small and never to carry more than they can hold”

Having this “wish” for our kids is so important but realistically speaking there may be times in their lives that it isn’t easy and they have big worries.  Often times these stresses come when they are adults and are faced with challenges.   I know my mom struggled so much with watching me deal with my son having childhood cancer.

She was so upset as a grandmother and a mother, it was twice as hard.  She wanted to take away the hurt for me but as a mother herself she knew that was not possible.  I wanted to take away the hurt for Mason and learned quickly that making it all go away is sometimes just not an option.  Life is not fair and the earlier kids learn that and can handle it the better off they will be.

Arming our children young with coping skills is very important.  Here are some ideas to help your kids develop healthy coping skills to manage through life obstacles.

Saying No

Sometimes you just don’t get what you want in life and there is no good reason for it.  Saying no to our kids shows them that concept.  They have to deal with disappointment and find ways to overcome the disappointment.   Help them see alternative activities or brainstorm with them about what else they can “do” other than the thing they really wanted to do.

Exercise with your kids

On so many levels exercise is critical for our kids.  Teach them that if they had a hard day at school going for a bike ride helps clear their mind.  Lead by example – make sure you are exercising on a regular basis.  Exercise is the single most important skill to dealing with stressful situations.  Kids have stress at a very young age and need to be taught how to manage it.  (Even if it is just Marie at school says she is not my friend anymore type of stress)

Encourage dialogue

Talking about problems is a wonderful way to connect with your kids.  They are just like us, we often feel better when we can share our problem or challenge with someone else and get their opinion about it.  Ask leading questions and try and establish an open line of communication with your kids early in life so when the bigger stuff hits they know you are someone they can talk to.

Love them lots and lots

Kids, like adults like to feel loved, cherished and protected.  Tell your kids every day how much you love them.  It will breed self confidence and security.   Knowing they have a team of people behind them who love them no matter what makes dealing with challenges much easier.  Make sure your kids know you are there to support them in every stage of life.  The reward will pay off later in life when they are secure in their decisions and can offer you the same love and support.

Write or Color

Writing is great therapy.  If your child can write stories or draw pictures of the problem that can be very helpful in dealing with it.  Sometimes just getting it out on paper helps them see that it is nothing to worry about.  Writing clears the mind and coloring relaxes the brain allowing more positive thoughts to emerge.  Try it – color with your kids.  I bet you come away just a tad bit more relaxed!

Showing kids that life is full of challenges both big and small and giving them tools to overcome the obstacles will allow them a better chance at having all their dreams come true.

“My wish for you is that this life becomes all that you want it to.”

My Wish

Have a great day!

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