Posted on Wednesday, 24th February 2010 by Catherine
Not at day goes by that I don’t think about and miss my mom terribly.
Losing her 4 1/2 years ago was one of the hardest events thus far in my life.
Getting on with life is something for another post, but today I want to share with you a very easy way to help keep loved ones present in your day to day life (even if they are gone).
My computer is in the kitchen (gasp). I know, judge if you like, but that small “work space” in the kitchen is what I have to work with right now as I have given up the designated office in our house to a playroom/guest room. I have a laptop (a Mac, which by the way I ADORE) in a docking station. When it is in the docking station I use a stand alone screen. After 2 1/2 minutes of inactivity my computer goes into screen saver mode - fondly known as memory lane in my kitchen.
I have set my screen saver to be a slide show from iphoto (in my display settings). I have thousands of pictures on my computer for it to choose from so one never knows what will be picked next.
We have been known to stop what we are doing and talk about the photo that is scrolling on my screen saver. When pictures of my mom pop up I always ask the kids ”who is that?”
Sometimes my youngest will say “mommy” -which breaks my heart (I do look just like my mom) but my other two will say “Grandma Char” and I will try and follow it up with some short anecdote about my mom. A story or memory I have of her.
It helps keep her “alive” in our world without a whole lot of effort and explanation. I do this with pictures of other relatives who live far away (Aunt Bob) as my youngest calls my brother in-law. We talk about when we might see our extended family again and we may re-live an activity from when the picture was taken.
My kids LOVE to guess who “the baby” is…as they looked pretty similar as infants. The photos are in random order spanning 6 years so we never know what we are going to get or what conversation it will spark around the kitchen table.
You could do the same type of activity with a digital frame. Load it with tons of different photos that have meaning to you or pictures of people you don’t want your kids to forget about.
Put the frame in a prominent area of your house – in the gathering spot and watch what happens.
Sometimes we watch the pictures for longer than we should; we get sucked in. I will go to the computer and my kids will say “no wait – I want to see more pictures” – in other words…don’t touch the mouse – the slide show will end.
These moments of remembering are very therapeutic and work for me. It is good for my kids too. We can stay somewhat connected to family near and far.
How do you keep memories alive in your home?
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This post is linked to WFMW over at We Are THAT Family~
February 24th, 2010 at 4:52 pm
i think that's a great idea.
My recent post WFMW – traveling
February 24th, 2010 at 7:35 pm
This is a great idea…I have a digital picture frame that is kind of the same thing, although it isn't updated nearly as often as it should be just because it's kind of a hassle.
My recent post Get Better Service at Restaurants…For Free!
February 25th, 2010 at 5:47 am
As usual, love the post and the idea. I think I am going to have to break down and get one of those digital frames. Since I have been to your house numerous times, I can just envision you and the kiddos standing around the computer and watching the slide show. I used to do this with my work computer – back when I worked (at a job that payed me – HA!) and I loved the slide show. I have lots of pics all over our house in frames and my little one (Gabbie) and I frequently look at and talk about the people in the pictures and who they are – some of these people she sees often, some very seldomly and some she has never and will never meet. I enjoy these moments with her and it defiantly keeps those loved ones close at heart. Thanks for the post Cath!!